Using the C’s as a positive model for shaping who your best self can be

The C’s are a concept that I was introduced to through a quasi-spiritual, psychotherapy approach called the Internal Family Systems. The Foundation for Self-Leadership published their list of 8C’s.

The reason I found this list of C’s to be helpful is because I can use it as a model of who I am when I am operating as my “best self.” It helps me self-regulate to be who I want to be each moment of the day. What I mean by that is I try to use conscious focus or being in the moment or mindfulness (whatever you want to call it) to be aware of how my bodily sensations, emotions, perspective and actions. I recognize that these are the “warning signals” that our nonconsciousness sends through our subconsciousness. These warning signals mean that we have activated a belief tree, and our believes may or may not be true.

By becoming more and more aware of these signals, I am increasing in my ability to identify when a psychological defense or a personality subpart is driving my action, which may or may not be productive to my purposes in life. When a subpart or a defense is in the driver’s seat of my consciousness, I am able to say to myself, “I am not exhibiting enough compassion right now” for example, and that helps me to self-regulate. I can ask that subpart to step back, out of the driver’s seat of consciousness, and I can do this very quickly because I have come to trust my “self” – the part of me that operates in abundance and growth and balance – as my best state of being.

The reason I can trust my self to be the best leader for the multiplicity of parts in my mind is because my self is the default state of being. It is who I am when I have released my fears and hurts. It’s who I am when I am not operating from a position of fear or protecting myself from injuries.

What are the 10 11 C’s

I use a nonsensical mnemonic that takes the 2nd letter of the first 5C’s and the 3rd letter of the last 6C’s.

Cheerful
Curious
Clear
Caring
Creative
Compassionate
Complimentary
Committed
Courageous
Confident
Connected

Hularmmunn – I pronounce it hulla-roe-mm-uhnnn

If you notice yourself being judgmental, say, “I need to have more compassion right now.” If you notice yourself being selfish, say, “I need to be more caring.” If you notice yourself being a pessimist or a downer, say, “I need to be more cheerful.”

Commitment to my obligations is a personal weakness, so I added it as another C.

Later on, I can go back and explore why those subparts arose to begin with that conflicted with my model of self. I use tools like IFS or consolidating, deconsolidating, and reconsolidating those schemas to achieve that.

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